Bweshako Umubili!

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Today is my wedding anniversary😍 I've enjoyed 3 STRONG years of marriage (clap for me👏🏾). Anyway, as I was celebrating this milestone, memories of ija day started to flood my system. Specifically the week going into the BIG day. I remember obsessively trying on my suit every hour for a week prior to the wedding fearing that on the day I wouldn't fit into it! Some of you may know this struggle...the struggle of having an outfit for a special occasion and not being entirely sure of how it'll fit! That was me and you know what? This fashion wave of slim fit outfits is creating problems for people. If you ever find yourself in a similar predicament I have some tactics I'm willing to share that I employed one week before the event to get that weight down real quick in order to patikiza myself into the suit.

Bweshako Umubili Strategy involves:

1. High protein, Low Carb, Low Fat eating protocol for 1 week
2. Cutting all fiber from the diet for 3-4 days prior to the event
3. Walking for an hour a day on a hill/incline
4. Water loading for 5 days followed by reduced water & salt intake 1 day before the event
5. Intermittently fasting hours prior to event

High protein, Low Carb, Low Fat eating protocol
High protein sources: Whey protein, lean cuts of beef, chicken (no skin), fish (boiled or grilled), goat, egg whites, Greek yoghurt. High protein intake kept my appetite suppressed and boosted my metabolism which meant reduced participation in any hunger games and increased calories expended through digestion.

Low fat sources: skim or fat-free milk, no cheese, nut butters without any extras (I'd check the label and if it listed anything other than the nut butter I avoided it), avocados. Keeping my calories low was the objective of this low fat approach.

Low carbs: For simplicity's sake it was restricted rice, restricted pasta, restricted potatoes, no nshima, no bread and no juice. Restricted meant an unreasonably small portion was permitted at two meal sittings per day for 5 days. Unreasonably small meant one potato, a rice or pasta portion that only allows for a portion size smaller than my fist worth of carbs per meal.

This low carb eating protocol aimed to deplete muscle and liver glycogen stores and the accompanying water (3g of water per g of carbohydrate). This likely accounted for 1-2 kilogram drop in body weight. It can sometimes be less, sometimes more depending on individual differences and how aggressive I was or you will be about the low carbohydrate intake. This approach is similar to the belly must go protocol. An alternative approach is banting. Though it's not what I did, you can expect results from it as well.

Cutting fiber
This meant temporary abstinence from fruits, vegetables and other fiber sources such as nuts, weetabix, muesli etc.
This reduced my gut content in the digestive tract and it can save you (men) from using your belt as a waist trainer and women from failing to breathe in your dresses. You can easily drop up to 2% of your body weight with this hack alone. If you weigh a 100kgs before doing this then you could possibly weigh 98kgs after. Every single kilogram makes a difference and can help people avoid looking like they borrowed their younger siblings clothes at whatever event they attend.

Water loading followed by reduced water & salt intake
This was done in order to lose water weight in the body. When properly executed it can result in up to 5% reduction in body weight. Water loading involves drinking a lot more water than you'd normally consume such as incorporating an additional 2-3 liters per day to an existing hydration plan for 2-3 days before gradually dropping my intake in order for me to adapt my body to flushing excess water in my system. Prior to implementation I was drinking 3.5 liters per day and after implementation I moved up to drinking 7 liters (a lot I KNOW). So, to summarize it this is what I did:
Day 1 —> 7 liters
Day 2 —> 7 liters
Day 3 —> 3.5 liters
Day 4 —> 1 liter
Day 5 (event) —> bare minimum water take. A few sips where needed to maintain sanity and basic function.
Because of the initial water load my body continued to flush water from my system allowing me to lose water weight. When paired with reduced salt intake the result of water weight was excellent. Salt/sodium encourages water retention in the body so when you eliminate/reduce it's intake you temporarily halt this process. Easy way to implement this is to temporarily reduce/avoid salt from the foods you prepare and eat a day before the event. So, limit all salty snacks such as pretzels, potato chips, nuts, canned foods etc.

Low Intensity Exercise
To lose weight you need burn more energy than you consume. With a week to go and a tight fitting outfit my options on how to approach this were limited nenzo ziba chabe it's operating na njala. I was subscribed to a gym back then and decided to put some serious wear and tear on the available treadmills. I'd set the treadmill at a 5 km/h speed with an incline that started at 5% and ended at 10-12% by the hour mark. I increased the incline every 10 or so minutes. I trained like this every morning for a week on an empty stomach.

Intermittently Fast for 16 hours prior to the event
I wasn't particular about the timing but the only time I ate was at the event/reception in the evening. I was fasting pretty much all day long. Let's assume you're going to an all white party slated for 7pm. What I'd do in that situation is intermittently fast from 4am the same day. For more on this eating protocol, click here. Otherwise on the event day itself just know that iyi day ni day ya njala😂 ni ku limba chabe.

All these elements combined can produce a temporary body weight drop average of 5%. I don't know about you but if someone told me I could go from 100kgs to 95kgs in a week?! Sign me up please! Listen, it's a temporary quick fix that won't last but at least you'll bring the fire🔥 to your designated event.


Note: You're going to feel uncomfortable and likely very moody so it's wise to tell the people around you what you're getting up to before you start burning bridges unnecessarily na ka mood kako. It's all temporary and what I'm highlighting should only be considered for a maximum period of a week. Lastly, please, before you end up as a corpse understand that I'm simply sharing what I personally did or would do. Proceed at your own risk when attempting such last minute maneuvering.

In other news, for those in need of marital fitness consultation ubwafya tapali epo ndi. Shibukombe ni nebo. 3 year veteran 👉🏾🗣️ ichupo chisuma.