Chikwela mu gym – ever experienced it? Most ladies probably have, except that in some cases it’s not always automatic that when a male stranger speaks with you he’s trying to get with you. I was exposed to a funny story this weekend when a good friend of mine shared his experience trying to be Mr. Nice Guy at the gym. Here’s what happened: A lady was working out in close proximity to him and he identified some technical flaws with how she was performing a certain exercise (please, don’t ask me why he was looking because I don’t know🤷♂️). He felt compelled to help out in a manner that he’d appreciate himself if he was doing something wrong so he approached with a friendly smile and attempted to guide her. Her response was negative and non-verbal. He said, and I quote - “Nick, she acted like I was trying to marry her!”😂 This is just one of many different interactions present in a gym setting, I'm sure many of you have your own story to tell about your experiences. I'd like to provide generic advice for gym goers in a bid to influence behavior.
What are the lessons from the story? Gents, unless you’ve been introduced avoid adding your husky voice to conversations with females you don’t know in the form of advice. Mind your business because even with good intentions you’ll likely be misunderstood. There’s floor trainers on hand to guide women that need assistance. Additionally, a gym environment makes women a lot more self-conscious about their bodies so all your unsolicited advice and drill sergeant behavior negatively impacts the psyche of women. Respect boundaries and keep your boostele and other forms of encouragement for your goons. Ladies, some of those men you like interacting with and pretending to need endless help from are people’s husbands. Gyms always have floor trainers available to help with anything that you need so drop the damsel in distress act and get help from the right people. In closing: I’d love to be able to encourage you all to freely interact but mu Lusaka muno there’s too many wolves in sheep’s clothing. For women that can’t shake off ichibeleshi perhaps a women’s only gym such as Evolve Gym along Independence Avenue is something worth considering. An environment full of strangers like a gym is always bound to attract ichibeleshi.
14 Comments
Given Majula
5/10/2021 12:15:59 am
Definitely one of the most off putting things about working out in a public gym.
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Roadrunner Zambia
5/14/2021 04:16:13 am
Yeah, the struggle is definitely very real for many people. Hopefully my anti-chikwela blog will help dissuade a few (or a lot of) people with such tendencies.
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Christine
5/10/2021 12:31:37 am
I have gym Phobia. The gym now looks like a social club that makes me feel extremely insecure.
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Roadrunner Zambia
5/14/2021 04:28:23 am
I can understand & relate to this. Initially, I had those same insecurities but over time I decided to build friendly relationships with people that started out with simple greetings such as 'good morning' or wish them well after sessions with something like 'enjoy your day'. Disclaimer: this communication was with individuals of the same gender as me. Anyway, now I have a couple friends from the gym and the social aspect makes the experience more enjoyable. We help each other and encourage other. A gym is a place where we all have the same objective; get better. Loosen up and don't sleep on the possible networking opportunities upper mwamba gyms can provide you with. From the gym to the BANK might be the outcome lol. #FinancialFitness
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Chawanangwa Majula
5/10/2021 12:35:55 am
Thanks for another insightful read.
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Roadrunner Zambia
5/14/2021 04:29:58 am
You're welcome:)
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Anna Majula
5/10/2021 12:46:05 am
This is why I workout from home🤷🏾♀️😂😂😂 chikwela chamene icho!
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Roadrunner Zambia
5/14/2021 04:37:33 am
😂 yaba.That's unfortunate. Alternatively consider an all women's gym like Evolve to avoid the chikwela at other gyms.
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Claudia
5/10/2021 01:18:54 am
It's very true. That's why some men don't even allow women to go to the gym. And some wives have second thoughts on why their husbands should not go to the gym. Chikwela. And it's both on the male and female.
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Roadrunner Zambia
5/14/2021 04:43:57 am
Yes, I actually know one or two couples that have serious misgivings about a gym environment and honestly I don't blame them. Mu lusaka muno unga peza game ni ten-zero. Anyway, I'll keep talking about it in the hope of changing people's behavior.
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Nsokolo
5/10/2021 02:10:55 am
Interaction in a gym is normal, if anything we help each other in a gym, understanding the difference between help and flirting lies with your motives for being in the gym, if someone disturbs your work out you have a right to tune them out, but if they're giving you advise on what will help your movements take it as free cause sometimes not all gyms have instructors
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Musanda
5/14/2021 07:29:07 am
I feel like ichikwela nikonse mwe.. it’s important to know what you’re doing and why.. we all go to the gym for different reasons, people should learn to just mind their own business, that way everyone is happy 😂
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Kaluba
5/18/2021 08:40:08 am
Interesting read. Thanks for sharing.
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8/18/2022 02:16:11 am
What an exquisite article! Your post is very helpful right now. Thank you for sharing this informative one
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